Thursday, November 20, 2008


Facebook has introduced a new dilemma to my life. Well, maybe the dilemma isn’t exactly new, but it puts a new twist on an old dilemma.

If you're unfamiliar with how it works, each Facebook member has a profile, and one can invite any other Facebook member to be one’s friend, thereby giving each other access to each other’s profile page. This information can include status (married, single, etc), interests, religious affiliation, hobbies, pictures, and anything else the user wishes to make public. Once two users are “friends,” not only do they have access to each other’s information, but if they are active in the Facebook community they can see what their friends are doing day to day, or however often they update things. So it’s like getting an answer to “What are you doing?” everyday, from all of your friends. One can basically keep in touch without having to actually keep in touch.

There have been people in my life that I have not wanted to keep in touch with. I’m sure there are some who would rather not keep in touch with me, for whatever reason. For the former, I just ignore their friend requests, and they can deal with that however they choose. But for the latter--and I can’t be certain about who these people are-- I never know how often to try and contact someone who does not respond. My college roommate FD is a good example. She obviously cannot manage to communicate clearly about whether or not to maintain a relationship with me, and since I got tired of trying without getting any encouragement, I have given up on her. And yet there are others…

There are people that I would love to maintain contact with, but since I don’t feel the same desire from them, I get stuck knowing how to proceed. Do I continue to try, hoping they’re just too busy with life right now but later on they might have time to catch up with me? Do I assume that the desire is there? Or does a lack of response simply mean the desire is not there, and I should not waste my time?

1 comment:

  1. If I don't hear back after one request, I assume they're busy and not checking facebook or want to limit their friend list or don't want to keep in touch...
    I really don't worry about which one it is.


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