Monday, February 23, 2009


I’ve been experiencing a strange phenomenon lately. I used to be afraid of MJ’s mom. I used to feel self-conscious and anxious around her, as if she was looking for fault in me (when she probably wasn’t at all). Now I almost feel drawn to her. I still hesitate looking her in the eye, and I still feel the twist of anxiety in my stomach when I see her. But I almost feel a desire to interact with her. I want her to notice me. It’s very odd. There is obviously some kind of draw that she and MJ have in common—it’s something that I’m particularly attracted to, but I can’t quite name what it is.

I probably just need attention lately. I check my email inbox a little too frequently.

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