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Last night I had ice cream with Colbie. It was awkward like meeting your favorite missionary companion is after the mission is awkward. During your time together, in the mission or at the temple, you have a purpose in common. You both want to serve in a chosen way, and you have fun together in that service. But when the service is over and you don’t have that in common anymore, something feels like it’s missing and you wonder what else you have in common, and in Colbie’s case, there’s not much.

Conversation between us last night was tentative and halted. I think she came, like I did, with a genuine desire to interact with me again, but after a few minutes, may have wished to be elsewhere. It was a long hour. And she’s not really a hugger either. Her hugs were awkward and stiff. I felt bad for her. I know she’s a genuinely nice person, and she’s more of a pleaser than I am. I don’t think I’ll subject her to that again. If we hang out again it will have to be with other people. I think I’m over my Colbie phase.